Friday, December 30, 2016

please dream, don't stop

I met many people throughout this winter break

I get to know my usrahmates
even I think just this past weeks I get to really know the person whom I close with

and I get to welcome new people into my life too

Lisbon had been amazing!
the trip would be one unforgettable event of my life

Allah sent us Aten
She inspires me a lot!

Thank you
for everything
for keep telling me to dream

we barely knew each other
but it seems like knowing you for the whole year ady hehe

tak ramai yang tahu aku macam dah give up untuk have dream
kadang-kadang aku pun lupa yang aku takde dream dah

Banyak nangis bila aten dah nak balik
sebab takut lupa lagi to dream high


and afikah dah nak bfg jugak

I could not imagine how usrah will be without her haha
surely I will be the most attentive listener ever
cause nobody will kacau-ing me
and trying to say something just by giving 'that' look
which distracted me as I tried to understand her 'eyes' message


I had this one belief
we should not have best friend

but Allah borrowed me one of His hamba
to be my best friend kejap

she will be leaving very soon
and as usual I'm not good with saying words

but I surely paling terasa kehilangan kejap hehs

4 bulan je lagi nak bfg Hidayah
please bring the best out of it

nanti menyesal padan muka haha

Saturday, December 3, 2016

3 dec

It has been 2 months since I wrote my last post
a lot og things happened in the past 2 months
all of them deserves a place in this blog
it's just me not having enough time (sbb aku banyak mengarut sampai habis masa)

Cork has lost its 'homie' feeling
I miss the old one

k mengarut

I remembered sembang-sembang with Kak S last weekend
she asked my opinion,
"why people leave?"

and I said
because the enjoyment of doing it 'hilang'

she nodded


actually it was based on my own experience

I wrote somewhere last year
I almost leave (haha dah bagitahu murabbi pun)

because I did not find it enjoyful
because I have to sacrifice a lot
especially my own feeling

but my murabbi reminds me about Nabi Nuh
tak best okay bila you preach but people sampai sembunyi sebab taknak dengar
that what happened to Nabi Nuh
but He never stopped!

because he did it atas dasar ketaatan
bukan sebab enjoy buat

muhasabah balik few years in tarbiyah
mungki tak secara indirect buat sebab orang
but I do enjoy ada akhawat yang baik sekeliling
ada kawan, ada teman, at least tak rasa sensorang
(walaupun kadang-kadang gaduh)


when I have the strength to do what I think I supposed to do
I did it

mula-mula tak rasa sakit
tapi sakit tu datang bila you want to go back to the routine

but you just not belong there


fly away


I don't know if the future-me would understand this

but hey future-me!
you have been trough a lot to reach today

appreciate the chances you get


ps: kalau futur memang lah rasa sensorang sebab iman tak bersatu dengan alam :(